Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Step One and THEN Step Two

Oh, the things you need to do before you get to where you want to be.

I need to live with my mother and step-father until I'm settled - with a permanent job and place of my own.  It feels, at times, like I never will again walk into my own living room or kitchen.  I know I will but I want it tomorrow!

I'm impatient these days, wanting to perform step three before I finish step one.  In a sense, I am starting from scratch again.  For over twenty years, I was part of a loving twosome.  Though I moved to the coast last fall, I needed to get my bearings, both literal and figurative.  I needed to learn to see the coast as a new resident, not just as a tourist that I've been for so many years.

Tomorrow, I go to Adecco for a job interview.  I'm nervous, but practically bouncing up and down with excitement and impatience.  I want to do the interview now!  I want to work towards the independence I've worked so hard to develop and need to re-learn now as a "single" person.

I'm going to school now and need to complete  the math I quit in high school.  Not being strong, at all, in mathematics, I quit math in grade 10 out of a sense, then, of hopelessness and frustration.  Now, in order to get into a Bachelor of Arts program in English, I need to not only re-acquaint myself with mathematics, but to persist and maybe even learn to enjoy it.  To quote a cliche, I always seem to want to put the cart before the horse.

Step One before Step Two; crawling before walking.  Remember!